If you have body-food issues, you may suffer from a lack of self-worth and self-confidence.
No matter how or when it occurred, you are left with this legacy.
You often feel that you are at the mercy of a force you cannot control.
That vortex of inexplicable emotions captures you and drives you to your particular body-food behaviours.
One thing that I know for sure is that these behaviours are symptoms and not the issue.
Behaviours come up when we try to ignore our pain and avoid acknowledging or dealing with it.
Diets don’t work because they do not address the underlying source of pain and what is really going on.
Your Life Wants Attention
The details of your life have an impact on you. Sometimes it takes an attitude shift and sometimes it takes focused and clear actions.
For now, awareness is the first and only necessary step.
Before doing anything, you need to let yourself know that parts of your life are not okay with you.
When you begin to pay attention to what drives you to your compulsive behaviours, your whole being gets a chance to relax because you are listening.
When you show up for yourself and attend to what’s there, your soul takes heart. When you ignore what’s in front of you, your soul gets discouraged.
If you can look at reality and see what’s troubling you, you are throwing yourself a lifesaver.
By looking at what’s actually going on, you are in effect saying to yourself, “I see that you are drowning and I am here to pull you out, one way or another.”
Here’s how.
- Notice that your body-food behaviours are kicking in. You want to binge or purge, you feel shame coming down on you. Whatever your ‘thing’ is, notice that it’s showing up.
- Get clear about what’s hurting. What pain is going on? Name it.
- Let go of judging this pain as bad. Simply be with it. There’s no good or bad here. There’s just what is.
- Find a way of expressing what’s going on. You may decide to write about it, which is an effective and quick way to get to what you are feeling and thinking. Share your discoveries with a trusted friend.
- Decide that you will find a way to make the needed changes in your life with respect to this area. Intend to find the right person or way to shift. It doesn’t have to be drastic. It doesn’t have to be now. Allow for possibilities to show up. Book yourself into a Body-Soul Presence Session to begin the process.
Here’s a place to start.
Look at the state of the following areas of your life:
- Career
- Family and friends
- Significant other/romance
- Fun and recreation
- Health
- Money
- Physical environment
- Personal growth
Now take a barometer reading.
On a scale of 1 to 10, where 10 means you are really satisfied, and 0 means completely dissatisfied, where are you with respect to all of the above?
Notice. And let yourself trust that you will get to those areas of distress and deal with each of them in good time.
Showing up for yourself with self-care will do wonders for reducing and eventually eliminating your body-food behaviours.
Over to You
What are the top 2 areas of your life where a small action would make a great improvement? Now celebrate yourself for being honest.
Write and tell me what this means to you. Do you have questions you want answered? Ask them. Others need to hear what you have to say.
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© 2014 Miriam Linderman
Great post, Miriam.
Looking beneath the ‘problem’, whether it be procrastination, self-sabotage, food, body issues, addictions, whatever, will unmask it as symptom and lead us to root causes. That’s where self-acceptance and compassion come in, and healing can take place.
“By looking at what’s actually going on, you are in effect saying to yourself, ‘I see that you are drowning and I am here to pull you out, one way or another.’ – love that!
Thanks for writing this, Linda. I know that when you comment here, others who are reading realize that they are not alone. You are so right about self-acceptance and compassion. We need to treat ourselves with the kindest of intentions as often as we can.
Thank you Miriam for such wonderful tools to explore what is holding me back. I will be sure to refer others to your website and your work.
Regards,
Deb
Hi Deb. So glad that you found this helpful. Hope to see you soon. Maybe at one of my Vancouver meetups?