There is a rich landscape of possibility in the world today, in the Western world of opportunity.
In the panorama of the media, you can read about how people are catapulting themselves to fame, fortune, and also having a substantial impact for good on the world.
You too may want to reach those heights.
Maybe you think it takes a certain kind of person, but you remember Oprah’s history, you read about Sean Stephenson, and you know that your history and current situation don’t even touch what they went through or their current realities.
It’s embarrassing to come up with excuses, when you see these and so many other lives thriving, when you hear the stories of people who have transcended so much more than you ever will.
Knowing about their lives makes it worse when you are not following your dreams.
If they can do it, get what they want, then why are you and I having nightmares with recurring themes of never having enough money, or the home we dreamed of?
Of not being recognized.
Of not being important enough.
Of being stepped over.
How can you dispel these self-limiting beliefs? Isn’t that what holds you back?
What’s True For You?
In a world of high-performing people, the act of comparison is soul-destroying and also confusing.
Where do you draw the line? How do you know that this is what you can do and no more?
When are you settling? And when are you not?
I have compared myself to what’s been out there my whole life.
As of today, I haven’t hit the fame or fortune mark.
There have been so-called legitimate reasons: trauma, addiction, bad habits, lack of awareness, understanding and years lost to all of that.
But then came the end of thinking like a victim and the beginning of taking responsibility for owning and leading my life in a way that served others and me.
So writing about trauma and lost years makes me uncomfortable.
They are not realities that stop me today.
Fame and Fortune
Fame for the sake of fame has little attraction for me.
Recognition is great.
I like that.
I like to make a difference with my words or through coaching when it frees people up in their heads, hearts and lives.
But fame?
Having to socialize or keep up or move away from simplicity?
Not so much allure there, although I know I have choice and could do my own version, as others do.
Would I love to have more than enough money to feel secure, to support the loves in my life who want to create things, and give to those who are less fortunate?
Oh yes.
Would I enjoy money as the result of being responsible, the owner of my life and capable? Hell yes.
But fortune can be an endless game and that’s not a motivator for me.
It may be for you.
As a human being and as a creative (and we all are), I want to express what wants to come from me, for the sake of producing and using the talents I have and spending every last ounce of energy so that when I am done, I will have used myself up well, no regrets.
That includes supporting others with love, which is in itself a creative, committed act.
As a coach, I want to inspire others beyond their limitations, to be as alive as they can be, and to truly step into their lives, no matter where they are, how old they are, where they’ve come from.
Choosing For Your Soul
The inward path, connecting with heart and soul, pushing limiting beliefs and thoughts to the side, allows us access to what is ours to live.
The comparison road can serve as a jumping off place to realize what fits and what doesn’t.
Hero worship is ill-advised. I have followed many.
Better to be your own hero, learn from others, and not to turn your life over to them for the owning – only for the shaping.
Learn from them. Try what they do best, if that’s good for you.
In the end, dream your own dream – your way. But do dream.
Do follow your heart’s path. Listen for it. Notice it. Signs are everywhere.
Everything you love tells the story of what your soul loves and wants for you.
Everything that hurts your gut is a sign too, that you are not in your right place doing your own right thing. Pay attention.
Be the self you are here to be. Notice everything. Signs are everywhere.
Over To You
What part of your life is someone else’s dream for you? How do you know?
What do you want instead? What stops you?
Share in the comments below or send me a private note here.
Wonderful words and works Miriam… thank you
Deb
Many resonances here for me, Miriam.
Comparison is surely one of the most direct routes to self criticism and self doubt. The Indian teacher Krishnamurti said ‘Comparison of any kind is a form of violence’. I try to remember this when I catch myself looking at the people I admire and feeling ‘less than’.
I spent the largest portion of my time so far living out someone else’s dream of what my life should look like, until my soul gave me a scary wake-up call over a decade ago with a life-threatening illness. Somehow this gave me the strength to say ‘no more’ and I started dreaming my own dreams.
It’s never too late to begin.
Thanks for yet another inspiring post.
I love that quote Linda. So true. For me, taking off the many corporate masks, the “must be seen as” masks and doing what other (successful) people/coaches are doing – they have been such long journeys into the lost and found! Often, I still lose my voice or am unable to speak words confidently about what I do and how I differ from others. The two years since leaving corporate has been a learning and pulling off onion layer after onion layer. That’s why I have such a passion for people finding themselves sooner than later, and being true to their souls. Thanks for commenting, for your ongoing support and for the great work you do in the world.
Thank you for reading and seeing me. And I see you Deb, your big heart and strength.
Thank you Miriam for your wise words. Yes to follow our own dreams is what it’s all about. I love the way you say about watching out for the signs which are everywhere for us, and I always think that if I can’t see any signs that’s a sign to stop and wait!
Tessa, happy that this piece resonated and that you show up for yourself, making your dreams real for you. We’re on the journey of a lifetime.