You and I have heard it a million times.
Be authentic. (Oh! I thought I was.)
Be yourself. (Okay…so who do you think is here?)
But being yourself is not as easy as it sounds.
At least I haven’t found it so.
And my coaching clients are also often exhausted and no closer to knowing themselves.
Because, aren’t we humans – all self-improving?
Aren’t we all supposed to LEVEL UP?
Climb the next Everest.
Make the first gazillion dollars in 5 seconds or less.
Next. Next. Next.
Who Was I Looking For?
I’ve been in the self-improvement and human development movement for over 40 years.
It began with a spiritual quest, a desire to touch the infinite or bring it into everyday life.
But I couldn’t figure out how to do that.
I couldn’t get the peace of mind I sought, or the promise of something better, through all the many ways I tried.
Not through the non-conformist paths of yoga, meditation, and ashram living.
Nor through the required and imprinted routes.
Attending university, getting married, raising a child, tripping over the corporate ladder (and attempting to fit in).
Therapies of every kind.
Searching, searching, searching.
Self-improvement was never a place to land.
There was always a deficit.
Something else to look for, to be dissatisfied with.
A dysfunction here, another there.
Always a topic of extreme fascination.
And that compulsive symptom was just one of many layers of pleasing and perfectionism and all the -isms we humans unconsciously protect ourselves with.
Little did I know that underneath the search and the self-improvement credo was a sensitive heart and tender soul needing to be seen, felt, heard and most of all championed.
By the time I came to the writing workshop that changed so much for me, I was a dry desert branch buffeted by winds.
I began to learn about Carl Jung’s Active Imagination and a whole new field of living and creativity opened up.
It opened the door to saying YES to who I was, to what I was experiencing in the moment, to the paths I had taken up until that point in time, and to the inner world of shadow and gold.
Did Self-Improvement Stop?
I became a life coach, after all.
That means that to the best of our abilities, we talk and walk like that duck!
But here was the difference.
I was now on the path of discovery and acceptance.
Of finding the true self beneath the layers of conditioning, of thought, of endless ego needs.
Of finding ways to be myself from the seed of me as the acorn who would turn oak, rather than from the seed of the collective.
It’s a different journey now.
It’s not about levelling up the ego self.
It’s about levelling up Compassion.
My soul needs it.
And the soul of the world is wailing for it.
Reflecting on what you read, what struck you as important to consider for yourself?
Notice your heart. Whatever it was, give it to yourself as a gift. Experiment with it.
Much love to you my friends.
Image by Free-Photos from Pixabay